


Then and Now

by sjhw_tolerance (mscorkill)



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-23
Updated: 2012-04-23
Packaged: 2017-11-04 04:37:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/389822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mscorkill/pseuds/sjhw_tolerance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the face of an uncertain future, Sam decides to give fate a nudge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Then and Now

**Author's Note:**

> For petite_stars, who found the pictures and posted them in her LJ and for xoxox who made the wonderful wallpaper with them that was my inspiration.
> 
> Originally posted August 2009.

THEN AND NOW

Daniel stared glumly at the inch or so of amber liquid in the glass in front of him. A slight sheen of condensation had already formed on the outside, the two ice cubes inside melting sluggishly. He didn’t like scotch, but Jack had insisted. Daniel sighed. Jack had insisted—possibly the last order he’d ever receive from the man.

“I’m going to go pay the bill.”

Daniel didn’t look up when Jack made his announcement, catching the movement out of the corner of his eye when he abruptly stood. Across from him, Sam murmured something he didn’t catch. 

“What?” He looked up, blinking as his eyes focused on her. She looked different—beyond the air of sadness that clung to her—in her dress blues. The crisp white blouse and blue jacket, gleaming with her captain’s bars and a modest display of medals was a far cry from the usual black t-shirt and olive drab of their day-to-day BDUs. He wasn’t used to seeing her dressed so formally, or Jack for that matter either. He couldn’t get his most recent memory of them out of his mind, of Jack in camouflage just different enough to be foreign and Sam in civilian clothes with long hair.

“Nothing,” she finally said, with a quick smile that he knew was meant to be reassuring. She toyed idly with her glass of scotch—which Daniel noticed contained only melting ice. “I guess I just can’t believe it’s over.”

“Yeah.” Daniel sat back, looking at her. “Soon it will all be over.”

“Daniel, we don’t know that for sure.”

He didn’t bother to answer and she didn’t say anything more either; his warnings and protests seemed to be falling on deaf ears. If they had only seen what he’d seen…. In an effort to shift his morbid thoughts elsewhere, he looked towards the bar. The upscale lounge was busy, both with patrons waiting for tables in the attached restaurant and people like them, only there for a drink. Jack stood patiently at the crowded bar, waiting his turn. He shifted, the overhead lights catching on one of his eagles, the rank insignia shining brightly in that brief moment. Daniel wondered if Jack had aspirations to be a general one day. Not that he’d ever have the chance now. None of them would have a chance, including him and Shau’re.

Shau’re…he refused to believe he’d never have the opportunity to find her now. He loved her…wanted to be reunited with her more than anything else in his life. It might be an idealistic dream, but he knew his life would be perfect if she was only with him again. He could face anything with her by his side.

Even death.

Daniel’s gaze drifted back to Sam. The Doctor Carter in the alternate reality hadn’t been so different from the Sam Carter he knew; both women were tough, determined and brilliant. He wondered if Doctor Carter had felt the same way about her General Jack O’Neill as he did about Shau’re...and he wondered about his two team mates. A grim smile tugged at his lips; he knew how Jack felt, had seen it slowly develop over the past year and after his recent experience in the alternate reality, he was suddenly curious about Sam. He supposed he could dance around the subject, but if he had learned anything from the events of the past year, it was that time wasn’t always their friend, so he cut straight to the chase.

“He loves you, you know.”

Sam looked at him in surprise, her eyes crinkled in a slight frown. “Daniel, what are you talking about?”

He jerked his head towards the bar, where Jack now finally stood at the counter, billfold in hand. “Jack. He loves you. I’ve seen it in his eyes ever since you got back from Antarctica.”

A delicate flush bloomed across her cheeks while she looked towards the bar. “No, Daniel,” she protested with a shake of her head; her normally confident voice soft and unsure. “I’m sure you’re mistaken. Besides, it’s against regulations.”

Daniel snorted derisively, his eyes once more on the table in front of him, slowly swirling his glass, watching the rich amber color become lighter as the melting ice mixed with the whiskey. “Right. Like regulations will keep two people who belong together apart. I saw you two together in that other reality and I’ve seen the same thing here. Besides,” he added, looking directly at her. “The regulations don’t mean squat anymore. The SGC has been closed down. Or don’t you remember?”

“I remember,” she murmured dully.

Falling silent then, he stared blankly at the diluted scotch in his glass and wondered whether it was drinkable yet when Sam suddenly spoke, her urgent voice a sharp contrast to her earlier lethargy. 

“Daniel, give me your knife.”

He looked at her, puzzled by the request but automatically reaching into his pocket for the small pocket knife on his key ring.

“Hurry,” she hissed. Daniel held it out to her and she quickly grabbed it, flipping open one of the blades. He watched as she twisted in her seat, bending down briefly, her face scrunched up in concentration as she worked on something in her lap. 

Curious, he sat up straighter, trying to peer over the table. “What are you doing?” 

There was a sharp cracking sound and she looked up, a triumphant smile on her face. “Giving fate a push,” she replied cryptically, sliding the knife back across the table towards him. She leaned sideways again and Daniel caught a brief glimpse of one of her regulation blue pumps in her hand and realized she must’ve done something to her shoe. 

Daniel raised an eyebrow when she sat back up, but she only shook her head when Jack suddenly appeared at the table.

“Ready?”

Daniel sat back and waited to see what Sam had planned, as she slid across the bench seat in the booth. Jack had driven his truck to the bar, but Sam had ridden with him, both of them with tentative plans to return to the SGC and begin the painful process of cleaning out their respective offices after their final moment of team commiseration. Daniel fully intended to return to the base, he wasn’t going to accept Kinsey’s pronouncement without a fight and his first stop was going to be Teal’c’s quarters. He still couldn’t believe the gall of the Senator, ordering Teal’c confined to base.

“I’m ready—oh!”

Sam fell into O’Neill’s arms so smoothly that if Daniel hadn’t known she’d planned…well, something—he would have accepted it as an accident. She clung to Jack, his arms automatically going around her.

“Sam! Are you okay?” Jack’s deep voice vibrated with concern.

“Yes,” she replied, keeping her arms around him and shifting closer as she looked down towards her feet. “The heel on my shoe is broken!” She lifted one elegant foot slightly off the floor, displaying her blue pump with the heel dangling by the sole.

Daniel stifled his grin, impressed with her ingenuous exclamation and acting ability. Though by the look on her face and the way she melted into Jack, he was pretty sure it all of it wasn’t an act. Figuring he could help her give fate a shove, Daniel schooled his features and voice to casual nonchalance. “Can you give Sam a ride home, Jack? I need to go back to the base….” He let his voice trail off and waited.

“Sure,” Jack replied, angling his head to look at Sam, who was still in his arms. “If that’s okay with you?”

“If it’s not too much trouble….”

“No, no trouble at all.” 

Jack was quick to reassure her, Daniel noted. So far it seemed her plan to nudge fate along was working and he wondered if he’d ever know just how far she was willing to push. They looked good together, he decided. Sam’s blonde head coming up just a bit past Jack’s shoulder, they were standing so close that when she turned her head, her hair brushed against Jack’s face. Jack didn’t seem to mind having Sam in his arms, beyond the somewhat bemused expression on his face Daniel had no trouble spotting the faintly hungry look that was always in his eyes when he looked at Sam.

“Thanks, Daniel,” she said, an incredibly self-satisfied smile on her face. 

Daniel watched in awe as she slithered gracefully out of Jack’s arms without completely losing contact with him and neatly slipped her arm through his. Using Jack for support, she slipped off both her shoes and still without letting go of him, managed to jam them both into her purse. 

“I really appreciate this, sir,” Sam said, picking up her purse. Her smile had transformed to one that was so warm and inviting that Daniel was positive he felt the heat from it. Jack had a rather dazed look on his face, so Daniel knew he could definitely feel it. 

“See you, Daniel,” Jack murmured.

Daniel watched as they left the lounge, Sam in her stocking feet, holding onto Jack’s arm. And Jack only had eyes for her, his whole manner caring and solicitous. When they disappeared through the front door, Daniel sighed softly, there was no point in him hanging around any longer. The ice had completely melted in his glass, so Daniel swallowed down the whiskey with one gulp before gathering up his suit coat and leaving the lounge. He stepped outside, the cool air brisk and refreshing after the warmth of the lounge. It was getting dark, the streetlights were beginning to glow. He looked towards the sky, searching the stars just beginning to shine bravely through all the light pollution and he wondered if already Apophis’ ships were out there, tiny specks of light masquerading as stars, unnoticed until it was too late.

He heard the low rumble of a powerful engine and he looked from the stars back to the parking lot where a black truck slowly rolled past him to the entrance, waiting to turn out onto the street. Daniel recognized the truck immediately, it was Jack’s, and he smiled his own satisfied smile when through the back window he saw Sam scoot closer to Jack.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Reckless was not a word Sam Carter would ever use to describe herself. Careful, methodical, thoughtful and diligent were the rather dull and uninspiring words she’d use. Oh, she had her moments. She was also strong and determined, she’d had to be to get to where she was in her career and life, but she was always cautious and controlled. Until now…when she’d thrown caution out the window and was practically sitting in her commanding officer’s lap in the front seat of a moving vehicle. Not that he’d protested when she’d scooted across the bench seat to snuggle up, thigh-to-thigh, next to him. 

And of course, she reminded herself, as of fifteen hundred that day he’d become her former commanding officer when they’d all become casualties of Kinsey’s ignorance and prejudice. She wondered idly how long it would take for them to be reassigned and whether she’d ever be satisfied with any other posting after her experiences through the Stargate. But then again maybe she wouldn’t have to worry about it because maybe Daniel wasn’t crazy and even now Apophis and his troops were on their way to Earth.

Anyway she looked at it, the future held no certainties or guarantees. And maybe Daniel wasn’t crazy when he’d told her that Jack O’Neill loved her. Lusted after her, maybe. She’d noticed how he’d look at her at first, with that hungry, speculative look in his brown eyes when he thought she couldn’t see. And she’d wondered if he was the type to force the issue, but he hadn’t. He’d been everything, well almost everything; she smiled ruefully, that she could want in a commanding officer. And over the days, weeks and months since her assignment at the SGC she’d come to admire and respect him and even think that they were becoming friends.

But she’d still catch him watching her with that hungry look glimmering in his eyes, especially the last few months…after Antarctica. Their relationship had changed during those cold days and nights trapped in the ice cavern, half-frozen and struggling to return home. She’d realized it when she’d returned to die with him. In those moments before the cold and exhaustion had claimed her, she accepted that she had crossed that invisible line. 

When they’d returned home, she’d tried to ignore her feelings. But then she’d catch him looking at her with that hunger in his eyes and all her resolutions to ignore her feelings would go out the window. And to be honest, she had to admit that she’d looked at him the same way. He was tall, lean and handsome—confident and cocky too, but with tragic undertones that should have warned her away but only drew her closer, like a moth to a flame.

She’d imagined what it would be like with him…to kiss him…touch him and be touched in return. She shivered slightly, but not from the cold, pressing closer to him and absorbing the heat radiating off him. Part of her thought she must be out of her mind to take such a huge risk, but that tiny voice of caution was overwhelmed by the rest of her—that wanted him desperately.

Tomorrow they could be reassigned to opposite ends of the country or Apophis and his mother ships could appear over Cheyenne Mountain and kill them all. Which left tonight…when it could be just the two of them. They were on the outskirts of her subdivision and she deliberately rested one slim hand on his thigh. 

“Turn right at the next stoplight.” 

He looked at her briefly and nodded, the light from the dashboard casting his face with shadows, but she had no trouble seeing the hunger in his eyes. She left her hand on his thigh, her thumb stroking the slightly rough fabric of his dress pants, the muscles beneath firm and she could feel him press harder on the accelerator. She must’ve given him the rest of the directions, because suddenly the truck stopped and they were in front of her house.

Once the engine was shut off the silence in the cab was almost tangible. Jack didn’t say a word; he opened the door and got out, holding out his hand to her. Their eyes met, his cool yet still filled with hungry desire and she realized this was the deciding moment. She knew he was giving her a choice—she could take his hand continue on the course she’d started or she could stop it now.

“He loves you, you know.”

Sam didn’t know if Daniel was right when she slipped across the seat and took Jack’s hand, letting him help her out of the cab, but it didn’t matter anymore. Even if they only had this one night, she wanted to know how it felt to be loved by Jack O’Neill. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sam’s gasp turned into a throaty sob, her back arching off the bed as pleasure almost too incredible to bear screamed through her. Only the pressure of Jack’s arm across her lower abdomen and his mouth pressed to her quivering flesh kept her grounded as she soared through the stars. When she finally came back down to earth, she felt dazed, her entire body boneless in the aftermath of Jack’s relentless caresses. Sam wasn’t really sure what she’d expected, a few fireworks maybe but not a super nova.

“God, Jack,” she moaned, when he crawled up her trembling body, covering her with his leanly muscled body. She thought he had pushed her beyond anymore pleasure, but fire still managed to race through her wherever his skin touched hers.

“Good?” 

His voice was low and rough and Sam forced her eyes open, half-expecting to see a smugly condescending look on his face. But instead of superior male bravado, his eyes shown with desire and…uncertainty? She should have known Jack O’Neill better—she did know him better and he was totally different from any of the men who’d come before. He was so close she could see the faint gold flecks highlighting the deeper brown of his eyes, his look still questioning.

Looping her arms around his neck, she raised up enough to brush her lips against his. “Oh yeah,” she murmured, tightening her arms and urging him closer. He didn’t need much coaxing, readily deepening the kiss. When she wrapped one slim leg around his hips, he shifted slightly against her and she moaned into his mouth when she felt his rock hard erection press into the soft flesh of her belly. She wanted—no, she needed him inside her but in spite of the very real evidence of his ardor trapped between their bodies, he seemed content to continue the sweet torture of his kisses and caresses.

But Sam Carter didn’t have a Level Five in hand-to-hand combat for nothing and with a move that would have impressed her instructor, she flipped Jack O’Neill onto his back, straddling his thighs with a triumphant smile on her face. Of course, he didn’t look too upset by the change in position; in fact, she rather liked the look of satisfaction shining in his eyes. His chest rose and fell heavily with his breathing, a fine sheen of sweat glistening along his shoulders and down his chest. 

And it was a fine chest…as was the rest of his body. She lightly trailed her fingers down his firm pecs, through the light dusting of hair and further, across the lean muscles of his belly. Her touch was delicate, her sensitive fingertips delighting in the slightly rough texture of his skin, his belly rippling in response to her caress. When her fingers wandered lower, his hips jerked towards her, a low groan rising up from his chest. As much as she thought she wanted to continue her exploratory caresses, the ache low in her belly that had been briefly—and spectacularly—satisfied, demanded more.

However, beyond her own pleasure, Sam wanted to bring Jack as much pleasure as he’d given her. The hands that had been lightly caressing her with tantalizing touches went to her waist when she rose to her knees. It was awkward at first, and she fumbled a bit, but with his help she slowly sank down on him. Her eyes drifted shut and she panted softly, concentrating on the incredible sensations radiating through her as her aching flesh enveloped him.

“Sam.” His voice was a low rumble and his hands tightened on her waist. 

She opened her eyes to find him gazing at her with such intensity that in any other situation she would have found his penetrating eyes overwhelming. But she didn’t feel overwhelmed, she felt powerful. Her lips curved in a languid smile and she started rocking against him in a slow and easy rhythm. It was so much more than she had ever imagined; the intimacy was almost unbearable, his eyes so dark and deep she felt like she was sinking into his very soul. Soon Sam let him set the pace, following the subtle movements of his hands…his body…her one goal to give him pleasure. 

Eventually she was braced over him, her hands on his shoulders and her hips moving steadily; his hands hard and urgent as he guided her; his hips now thrusting up into her. He groaned and she watched it happen for him, when his whole body stiffened, his face contorted in ecstasy. It was incredible and unexpectedly humbling sight, to have this amazing man’s trust and see him at his most vulnerable. 

Sam rode him through the endless moments of pleasure, gradually slowing her movements down, only then realizing the extent of her own exhaustion. Her muscles trembling, Sam cautiously lowered herself down onto his chest, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in his throat. He was still shaking, his chest rising and falling with his harsh breathing, his skin burning hot. She could feel his muscles slowly begin to relax and she felt him slip out of her; she closed her eyes on a feeling close to despair, nuzzling his throat and wondering if he would want to go clean up or worse yet—leave. But he did neither, his arms closing around her as he shifted them into a more comfortable position, with her curled up against his side, his arms tight around her and her cheek resting against his chest.

Sam sighed softly, content for the moment to lie quietly, luxuriating in the unexpected sweetness of the aftermath in his possessive embrace. The future was incredibly uncertain, yet she felt strangely at peace. No matter what happened ten minutes or even ten years from now, she would always have this moment and the memory of the first, and perhaps only, time they made love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Do you remember the first time we made love?”

Behind the shield of the morning newspaper, Jack O’Neill frowned. When your wife asked if you remembered a specific event that had happened years earlier, it was never a good thing. It was either a test or some other trap designed to trip up the unwary husband. He however, was not the unwary type and little did Sam know that he knew the answer to that particular question. Hell, the memory was seared on his brain. That night ranked up there with the half-a-dozen or so moments in his life he’d never forget—both good and bad. And that one had been oh-so-good.

But he was also a cautious man. Over half-a-dozen years spent fighting the big bad throughout the galaxy and another two and a half spent at the Pentagon had ensured that, so without lowering the newspaper he said, “Yes.”

“It was ten years ago today.”

That announcement had him lowering the newspaper and gazing at his wife, who sat across from him with an indulgent smile on her face and cradling a cup of coffee in her hands. Ten years…sometimes it seemed like just yesterday. In his eyes, she was still just as beautiful today as she’d been then. There were some changes, of course. Her hair was longer, hanging down over her shoulders, just as his was now mostly white instead of brown, though still regulation short. Her blue eyes were still just as clear, the tiny laugh lines gracing her face merely adding to her beauty. 

Jack’s eyes narrowed slightly. Nothing in her manner—or in the kitchen of his townhouse in DC—seemed threatening…however caution still prevailed. “You don’t say.”

“Are you sure you remember?’ She had a skeptical look in her eyes now.

“Sam, you wound me.” Setting the newspaper down, he continued. “Of course I remember. It was right before Apophis tried to attack Earth, when Kinsey shut down the program.”

“Did you ever wonder why I chose that moment to seduce you?”

Jack raised an eyebrow. “Seduce me?”

She chuckled, pushing her chair back from the table and walking over to the counter. Jack watched her appreciatively, she was still as slim and toned as she’d been all those years ago. She poured herself some more coffee. “Yes, I seduced you.”

Jack’s brow crinkled in momentary concentration; while his memory of them making love was very vivid, his memories of the events immediately prior to that incredible night were less so. It was a moot point anyway, after ten years. And he could honestly say he hadn’t ever assigned any particular significance to the circumstances surrounding that night. But she had him curious now. Picking up his cup of coffee, he casually asked, “So why did you decide to seduce me?”

“Daniel told me I should.”

Jack almost choked on his mouthful of coffee. Coughing and sputtering, he quickly set the cup down and grabbed the napkin she held out to him. “Daniel?” he asked, once he could get the word out.

Sam chuckled again. “Yes, Daniel.” Her eyes turned serious. “He told me that you loved me.”

It was hard for him now, to remember a time when he hadn’t loved her. The past ten years hadn’t been easy and there had been some rough times, but there had been more good times and the one constant through it all had been his love for her. “Well,” Jack conceded, “he was right. I did love you.” He pinned her with his best stern General look. “And I do love you.”

“Yes, dear,” she said, pressing a kiss to his cheek before sitting back down.

Jack didn’t pick the newspaper back up, but instead studied her for a moment. The last few weeks hadn’t been easy for her, on leave while she awaited reassignment after her abrupt dismissal as commander of the Atlantis expedition. Damn the IOA anyway and their sneaky political agenda. Mentally reviewing his calendar for the day, Jack decided there was nothing that couldn’t be postponed, cancelled or rescheduled.

“So,” he said, clearing his voice. “What you’re saying is that this is an anniversary of sorts?”

“Ten years,” she agreed.

“Well then…how about we celebrate it the way we did ten years ago?”

“Jack O’Neill! Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?”

He gave her his best lopsided grin and stood up, pulling her to her feet and into his arms. “If you mean spending the day in bed with my wife, then yeah, that’s exactly what I’m suggesting.”

“Hmm….” Her blue eyes sparkled and her voice was playful when she answered. “I think I can clear my schedule—”

His kiss was rough and a little urgent at first, but soon settled into slow and familiar, savoring her taste and the feel of her lips. When she had melted against him, her face flushed with passion, he pulled back slightly and looked into her loving eyes. Even after ten years he still wasn’t sure how he had been so blessed. And if he had Daniel to thank for it, well, he could live with that. 

Quickly calculating the distance from the kitchen to the master bedroom and factoring in Sam’s weight, Jack did the math and decided to go for it, sweeping Sam up into his arms. She shrieked softly and laughed, looping her arms around his neck. He grinned and with his precious burden in his arms, carefully made his way through the kitchen door and down the hall to the bedroom. “Oh,” he added, kicking open the bedroom door and gently lowering her onto the bed. “Remind me to thank Daniel the next time we see him.”

THE END


End file.
